Blind Date
by Roxius
Summary: Leon is set on a blind date by Panther, plus Wolf is all for it! LeonX? Crack pairing. Not yaoi, okay? PLease R & R! No flaming either, got it? I might make one of two more StarFox fics in the future, too...


Wolf stormed into Leon Powalski's room, grabbed the sadistic chameleon by the shoulders, and said happily, "Leon...I am so proud of you!" Leon sprayed his boss in the face with some pepper spray before asking, "What are you talking about, I shudder to ask?"

Smirking, Wolf nudged his good buddy in the side and replied, "C'mon, don't act like you don't know! Leon...you're going on a date tonight...am I right?" If Leon had a sense of humor, he would have burst out laughing. Instead...he just sighed.

"This...this is a joke, right?" Leon asked hopefully, "You can't really be serious...me, on a date with a woman?" Good lord...Wolf, please tell me you're joking!" Wolf was still smiling as he exclaimed, "Nope! Panther told me all about it! He told me how you had been looking around on dating sites for some time now, and you've finally found the perfect woman!"

Leon sighed again as he reached for his blaster behind him. Getting up, he ran out the door and headed straight for Panther's room. 'I should have known that cocky bastard would be the one at fault here!' Leon thought furiously, his blaster set from 'STUN' to 'KILL'.

Leon kicked down a door at the end of the hall and aimed his gun at Panther, who was busy texting several girls at once. "Oh ho! You plan on shooting Panther, eh?" The black panther man said with a bit of sarcasm. Leon scowled and muttered, "Don't play dumb with me, you disgusting pimp! You set me up on a date...didn't you?"

Panther laughed and tossed his text messager to the side. "Yes, it was Panther who did it!" Panther replied with obvious flare, "Panther did it because Panther wanted Panther's good friend Leon to be happy! Do you not understand...Panther?"

Leon reset the pistol back to 'STUN' and shot Panther twice, completely paralyzing the big black cat for the next ten hours. 'He says his goddamn name too many fuckin' times...' Leon thought as he stormed back to his room. Since he was a 'gentleman', he couldn't just go and turn down a woman's invitation.

Of course, he didn't seem to consider the fact he never knew about the date in the first place...

* * *

"So...this is the place, huh?" Leon asked aloud, looking up at the huge fancy Cornerian Restaurant in front of him. The sadistic chameleon man was wearing a new black tuxedo with matching pants and shoes. A small bouquet of roses was held tightly in his right hand. He was really regretting this whole thing by now. 

Nearby, Wolf and Panther were hiding in a pile of bushes with a radio com to communicate into an ear piece Leon wore. It was so they could help him out with any problems on the date. "Good luck, buddy!" Wolf exclaimed with overjoyed excitement as Leon reluctantly heading into the building.

'Okay,' Leon thought, 'Before coming here, I told Panther to tell my blind date to wear a red scarf to identify herself. So...where's that red scarf?' Leon pushed through the large crowd of various democrats and rich snobs, his bulging eyes scanning for even a hint of a red scarf. Suddenly...he saw it.

Except...the person wearing it was...

Leon took a few steps backwards in shock. Fumbling around with his ear piece, he hissed, "Wolf...Panther...are you sure you had my blind date wear a red scarf? Please tell me you told her to wear a green scarf or something..." After a few moments of static, Panther's voice came out of the other line: "No. We told her to wear a red scarf...over."

Leon couldn't believe it. His blind date...the girl Panther got him paired up with by force...was Krystal of Star Fox?!! 'This isn't going to end well...' Leon thought grimly as he walked up to the blue fox woman and tapped her shoulder lightly.

Krystal spun around to see who it was, but she let out a shriek when she realized she was only inches from Leon's face. "Uh...hey, Leon!" Krystal said nervously, still a bit uneasy. She noticed the tuxedo the lizard boy was wearing and smirked. "Oh...so you're on a date, huh? You got her flowers, too!" Krystal exclaimed, "You know...even for a bad guy, you're not so bad, right?"

Leon blushed and stared down at his shoes, unable to bring himself to look at Krystal. "Well...why are you here?" he finally asked, trying to see if he could get Krystal to figure out the rest on her own.

Krystal smiled sheepishly and replied, "...I actually came out here to meet with this guy I've been chatting with on an online dating site for a while. We're finally going to see each other for real for the first time! I'm so excited! I mean, since it didn't work out between Fox and me...I've been feeling kind of lonely..."

Leon could kind of understand how Krystal felt. He had been feeling alone for most of his whole life...despite having a good friend like Wolf around. "So...what do we do now?" Leon asked after a while. Things were starting to feel rather awkward between them.

Suddenly, music began to play, and nearby couples started to dance with one another. Sighing, Krystal smiled at Leon and asked, "...Since I'm still waiting, why don't we dance together or something? You know...to pass the time?"

Leon knew he had no other choice, so he took Krystal's hand. Outside, Wolf was cheering his friend on while Panther grieved to himself...


End file.
